It is Thankful Thursday and as a pregnant mom, I am Thankful for my shower! Yes, you read that right…. My Shower! My shower time is where I get my mommy time right now. It is my happy place! Do you have a happy place?
My shower time started when I was pregnant with Danyella and was told no baths and no standing for more than 5 minutes in the shower. So, I began to sit in the shower so I could enjoy the steam and water for more then a few minutes. The water dripping on me was like being outside in the rain. Sometimes we need to just feel that peace and be one with the water. This continued after Danyella was born because it became a place where I could almost meditate, relax and clear my mind.
Being pregnant with Baby Evelynne has been uncomfortable between the ongoing morning sickness, growing belly and having a baby pushing against my ribs. Add that to just the stress of needing to move, starting school and being out of work. My shower time is my sanctuary. There are times where I can just sit for an hour or more. The times where I need to take a quick shower, they just suck the life out of the moment of getting out of the shower. Like it is unfinished business that I need to take care of still. My hour-long shower times will be cut shorter after the baby comes but until then I will be enjoying my shower times.
Let me start off by saying, I am not one of “those” dance moms where I get all crazy and cut throat so that my child is the focus of the dance studio and rant all about the studio to get my way! Not my style unless I feel the need to step in because there is a problem or something comes up.
Even though the show “Dance Moms” is what inspired Danyella to want to take her first dance lesson at age 8, I vowed to never be one of those crazy sports moms because they just embarrass themselves and more importantly their child. Don’t get me wrong, the drama on that show can be addicting but I started watching it with Danyella years ago because she loved to watch the dances these girls would learn and perform in less than a week.
When Danyella first started out at the studio, she wanted to take Musical Theatre and Jazz. She wanted to take the musical theatre class because she loved watching me work on the costuming for local theatre shows when she was younger. With jazz, Danyella knew that it was fundamental in learning dance. I was shocked when I saw her excel in dance because in everyday life she is quite clutzy (don’t tell her I said that). Part way through the year, we added a ballet class to her dance schedule and Danyella found her passion in her young life… Dance!
All this girl wanted to dance, day and night. It was heart-warming to see her find a passion like this at a young age. That first year, she was much older and taller than the other girls in her classes because I didn’t know how she would like, let alone find a passionate talent in dance.
At the end of the year, her studio announced that they were forming their first ever Mini Elite Competition Team. Even though Danyella had only been dancing for a year and wasn’t at the class level required to audition, she was encouraged to audition anyway. Bad mom moment…. my thoughts on her auditioning were that she would learn the lesson that she needs to work hard to achieve things she wants in her life. Aka, she wouldn’t make the team and learn the lesson of losing and being denied something you desire.
2 months after auditioning, I received the email and was mind blown, shocked to read that she had made the team! What?????? She had only been dancing for a year…. A YEAR! Did she really have that innate ability to dance that she would make a competition dance team? How would these other dance moms act? Would we be living the show’s drama now?
After 2 years of dancing under our belt and one year of competition team, I am so happy to talk to you about MY life as a dance mom! Both Danyella and I have made wonderful friends through her dance passion. When you spend every week, sitting in a room with the same moms you begin to have conversations. Most of those conversations began with a mom asking what I was crocheting or making because I can’t just sit and not have my hands moving. From that first conversation, we began to share stories of our kids and our lives. That is how friendships are formed and kept.
The Elite Moms had an extra special bond because we would live our lives based around dance every weekend from August through March. We would travel together to the competitions and bond over what it was like as a first year competition mom. We were all in this together. Eventually, we started connecting over Facebook and still chat about what is going on with our girls. We have been able to commiserate over our girls and their behaviors. It was great to know we weren’t alone with our tween girl problems.
As the girls bonded as a team, so did us moms. We have learned to rely on each other when we need help or have questions and never feel alone in this experience. This year, the team has changed because some people have left the tea
m, so girls moved up and new girls were added. Our girls embraced the new girls just as us moms embraced the new moms. Another new change was the addition of the Petite Elite Team, which consists of some younger girls and a new set of moms. The Minis and Petites bond and help each other just as us “experienced” (not really but we fake it) moms help the new moms navigated the uncharted waters of having a child on the competition team.
Last night, I was reminded of the bond that us dance moms have because as I was sitting for 3 hours of classes on the first week of the new season. Witheach class, brought in a new set of moms and we would all begin to catch up from either having the summer not seeing each other, having a year of our girls having opposite schedules or having a week since the last elite rehearsal. Each conversation just picked up like we never lost anytime.
It was an eye-opening experience to see all us in a room just talking like we have been friends forever. This is what a dance mom life truly is! It is not about drama, it is not about making sure our child is number one or gets special treatment, it is not aboutthrowing adult temper tantrums. It is about showing our children that they should pursue their passions. It is about showing our children that the friendships they make with their fellow dancers are ones that should be cherished. It is about showing our children that we should support one another no matter what and no matter our age.
Today was my first official day of classes that I attend at the actual college (my online classes started already)! It was scary as hell to pull into that parking lot surround my kids that were closer in age to my oldest child then to me. I swear you could feel my heart pounding out of my chest as I looked for a place to park (note to self show up earlier so I can park closer and not in the outskirts of town). Why am I so damn nervous?
The reason I am so nervous is because I was living in fear of being judged by all of these millennial that will shape the future of our lives with new technology, politics and so much more. Here I am… the old, pregnant woman taking classes among all of these young kids who are concerned about their Snaps and the latest party. How can I keep up with them?
My first class today was Speech which is something that comes pretty easily for me because of my background in theatre plus making speeches for the Homeless Shelter that I have been associated with for a few years now. I walked into class a few minutes late because with my belly I can only walk so fast from the other side of the parking lot and then up to the second floor to class. Already red in the face….
I take a seat in the front of the class because that was a close seat to the door and the other people at the table looked a little older than 18 and out of diapers. The professor keeps going and I start to feel more at ease until I look around the classroom and see all the young kids. Wow I begin to feel so so so old! There are a few of us older people though I think I am the oldest out of 24 and definitely the only pregnant one.
The first video we watch is about how we need to have self-confidence in ourselves and about our character. It was a wonderful video and one that I needed right in that moment. I needed to get past my fear of these kids in my classes because I would be spending 3 hours a week for the next 14 weeks with them plus I was going to have to get up in front of the class and talk to them.
I am thankful for being able to take this opportunity to get past my fear of these millennial and take courses that will help me not just in my career but in my everyday life. When I am at work or on stage, I don’t think twice about what I need to do or say but getting up in front of these kids gives me massive anxiety but I am thankful that I will work on getting past my fear this semester. I might be old and I might be pregnant but I want to further my education and life which is worth every single moment of fear and anxiety.
In my 36 years of living, one thing I tend to forget to do is living a happy life for myself. As a mom, I’m always taking the time for my kids to make sure they are fed, clothed and happy. As a girlfriend, I make sure that my boyfriend’s needs are met and he is happy. As a daughter, I make sure that my parents have the help they need to make their lives happier. Same goes for my friends. The big question is…. when do I take this time for myself to make sure I am happy?
The answer to that question…. when I can remember to take the time!
Here are some small tips to living your happy mom life each day…
Enjoy your shower time! This is my favorite time of the day because I shut the dog, the kids and attempt with the boyfriend out of the bathroom, sit and let the water just run over me. When I was pregnant with Danyella and on strict bed rest, I was told that I could shower but I had to sit in the shower. I don’t use one of those old people shower chairs but I do use a cushy tub pillow. There are times that I can sit in the shower and let the water run over me like I was in the rain. I don’t get these times alot but I enjoy the moments when I get to relax in the shower, just me, myself and I!
Enjoy your Potty Time! Oh yes I went there! The Mommy Potty Time is usually filled with kids and pets running in and out or shouting your name. Even for a 30 second pee, I let the kids and dog run amuck while I take the few seconds to hop on Pinterest. Just about since the start of Pinerest, I have been obsessed with this site/app. I have over 100 boards and thousands of pins all done in just a few seconds and minutes I have on the potty and other down times. Pinning makes my life feel more relaxed and I have found so many recipes, diy projects, kids projects and more to help my life.
Get up Early or Stay up Later! I know that many mom bloggers talk about getting up a few minutes early to take Me Time but that is not me. I am a night owl and that will never change. I can be up until midnight, hours after the kids go to bed but ask me to get up even 15 minutes earlier and forget it because the snooze button will be hit! If you are a morning person then kudos to you! I like to take the time to do some stuff for me whether it is doing some reading, crocheting, journaling or other things that I want to do just for me.
They might just be a few, simple tips but these are things that help me enjoy a happier mommy life. I hope that these few tips can help you enjoy your happier mommy life!
Originally I wanted to make my Thursdays my day to rant but on my path to find the positive side of life, I changed my mind and am making Thursday into Thankful Thursdays. We should all take the time to find the things we are grateful for in our lives.
Yes I could start this off with being thankful for my friends and family because I most definetely am grateful for them but sometimes it is finding the small things that make your life, just that your unique life that makes us even happier. I am going to list my 5 small things in life that I am grateful for this week and I want to hear what small things you are grateful for!
I am grateful for Netflix. Yes it is completely materlistic of me to say an internet app but when you are on bed rest and all you can do is sit around, bing watching Grey’s Anatomy, Sons of Anarchy and other awesome shows becomes a way to avoid going completely stir crazy.
Facebook Marketplace and Yard Sale groups. As we begin to pack to move, I have noticed how much stuff we have accumlated over the years. Let’s just say it is alot more stuff then we really need especially when I want to buy more stuff because it would look pretty in my house. Without having an income right now, selling off this extra stuff has been a great way to pay for groceries and have less stuff to pack for the move.
Pumpkin Spice Lattes. Yes I am one of those crazy Pumpkin loving peeps! I love anything pumpkin but I look forward to the day that every coffee joint announces or people secretly find out they have Pumpkin Spice Lattes! I have found my local Starbucks secretly is making them and DD is starting theirs on the 28th.
Washer and Dryer in my house. Have you ever had to tote 6 baskets of dirty laundry into your car, out of your car, into the laundry mat, sit for 2-3 hours (I didn’t wany my clothes stolen), back into the car and back out of the car. Then it was having to fold the laundry and put it away. Since installing the nice, big washer and dryer in our house my life has gotten alot easier.
Notebooks and Journals. I have always been one that loves to write things down. I keep notebooks of notes and tips about projects I am working on. Journals of my thoughts. I am a big advocate on writing your thoughts, wishes and gratitude down because writing it down triggers in your brain to make it a reality.
A great way to start your day or end your day is with this gratitude journal that I found on Amazon! (Click the image to check out the book on Amazon)
Take the five minutes everyday to write down what you are grateful for especially on those bad days that you feel like nothing can go right. It is those days that you need to find the positive side of life and you will see more of the good moments and less of the bad moments. Don’t forget to share your small things you are grateful for below!
It’s a Tuesday morning which means life will be less stressful than Monday morning and a little more relaxed.
That was my exact thoughts as I lay in bed this morning debating on whether to sleep in a little longer since Danyella spent the night at my mom’s and I don’t have an appointment first thing. I mean if there is no rush to get up then my pregnant butt should relax for as long as I could… right?
Well that was BEFORE I made the mistake of looking at my phone….
First email that caught my eye was from the HR department of my job basically telling me that I was in non compliance because my OB hasn’t been able to finish the 30 pages of paperwork for the FMLA so that I can collect a little for a little bit time while I am on bed rest. So that has been a going back and forth with HR all day hoping and praying that I will still be able to collect something because my family needs any extra money we can to get ready for this baby girl.
The second email was from my college telling me that I was selected for the IRS verification for my FAFSA application. So they give me all these instructions on how I can do this online but it doesn’t work. I go to the FAFSA homepage hoping to find answers on how to get this to work only to find out that FAFSA disabled the ability to do the online verification until the next season which who the hell knows when that is! Next option is to access my transcripts online instantly through the IRS website but I don’t have a credit card, mortgage or auto loan in my name (downfall of trying to keep my expenses down and not fall behind on loans by not having loans). So onto the third option, order my transcripts to be mailed to me. According to the site it can take upto 10 days to process my request… well classes start in 3 weeks so I might be able to start classes because I do not have any money to put towards my tuiton fees. I did email the financial aid woman but have yet to hear back about how long this will take to process will take and if I should stop my plans to go back to school (yes I shed more than one tear over this today).
On a bright note…. I stopped into work and was able to see some of my friends and eat my favorite French Onion Soup. I have 3 weeks to try to hope, pray and keep on top of the financial aid woman to process my aid so I can start classes (squeaky wheel gets the oil first). And best of all…. my local Starbucks secretly has Pumpkin Spice Lattes back plus I got 2 more maternity clothes for $10 on clearance at Target. A win win day after all!
Somedays are harder than others to find that bright side but there is always a bright side to every dark side of life. One thing that listening to The Secret (I listen to the audiobook everyday) and other positive life changing books has taught me that if you dwell on the bad then more bad will come but if you find the good in each situation then the good things will occurred more often. Stay positive and stay happy on this Terrific Tuesday!
Recently, I joined a Mom Boss Bloggers Facebook Group because I want to expand my horizons and see what other mommy bloggers are posting about in their lives. I know that I haven’t been posting about my business lately but this will be changing this week because I need to get back to expanding my business. Anywho…
Another blogger is looking to feature vision boards on her blog and was looking for volunteers. I have had a vision board for the past 8 years after reading Louise Hay’s inspirational books where she tells her readers to make a board of what you want to see in your life so that the world knows what to bring to your life. I strongly believe in vision boards and how powerful they can be if you continued to grow your visions and your boards.
To me, my vision boards are a continuous work in progress because when one goal on my board is accomplished then it is time to find a new goal. Sometimes my board has been full of pictures, words, quotes and goals I have written onto the board. Since I was a teen, I have collected old magazines my grandmother would get rid of because I wanted to keep the recipes or crafts I wanted to try. Since starting my first vision board, I have been able to go through those magazines to help create my boards. Each day, I take one magazine cut out things for my board and other things that I want to keep.
My current board has been reworked over the past 2 years and some of those goals have been accomplished but some have not because I got away from my self-care and vision board. The blogger I will be working with on my new vision board requested a board having to do with positivity and how to stay positive. So this board will contain a lot of quotes, positive words and images.
This is something new because I will not be including specific goals that I want to achieve (that will be kept to my other board) but keeping to the positivity and self-care theme. I believe that things happen for a reason and that this new challenge for a vision board has come at a time where I have started my self care journey over. I cannot wait to share my new board when it is finished!